Beyond Platform 9 and 3/4

Over the Christmas break I had the opportunity to travel by train. Most, much like myself until a month ago, are unaware that train travel still exists. Due to this general lack of information, I now take the time to share my experience.

So Christmas break ended and I found myself at the train station in Sacramento, California. I stepped on board and waved goodbye to my family. I still felt a little unsure about this whole train business. I felt unprepared. What I really would have wanted was a wand, but decided to risk it without one. I put my luggage on the first floor and made my way up to the second floor where all the passengers sit.

I sat next to a boy who was also returning to Hogwarts. I mean BYU. For privacy’s sake we’ll omit his real name and call him William. I soon found Willy was likeable enough, although I couldn’t understand him at times because he spoke upwards of 9 different languages. Infact, later on during the evening he woke up and said in a daze, “Que horas son?” This time I recognized the language. This was Spanish for “What time it?” I was tempted to respond with my favorite Spanish phrase, “por supuesto!” But, of course, that phrase was not applicable to the current situation and probably would have confused poor Bill. So I refrained and informed him it was 11:30.

Shortly after the train started its journey I was struck with hunger. Buying food on the train would have cost two arms and five legs, so luckily my dear mother had prepared a sack lunch for me, just like the good ol’ days. I quickly found most of the necessary goods: sandwiches, triscuits, sliced apples with caramel dip, etc. But something was horribly wrong. I would have screamed if not for fear of being sent to the caboose for misbehavior. Where was the chocolate?! What on earth was I supposed to do if the dementors came?! Wandless. Chocolateless. Hopeless. Why was this happening to me, and where was Chuck Norris when I needed him the most?

I calmed myself down. A few hours passed and we were informed that the toilets in our train car were out of order (located underneath us), and that we needed to go to a different section of the train to use the restroom. A light went on above the stairs reading “TOILETS OUT OF ORDER.” They repeated the announcement many times over the loudspeaker throughout the trip. It baffled me, however, to see that several people still got up and went down to use them. I concluded that train riding must cause some people to become temporarily deaf and illiterate. I’ll be sure to ask my doctor about it during my next check-up.

OK that’s it for today. Stay tuned for the conclusion of my travels next week.